Question by NECROMOMICON: If you’re a person just getting into Scientology wouldn’t you have already heard the ‘Big Secret’ by now?
Seriously, how can they keep that a secret?

Xenu the Space Overlord decided to depopulate his overcrowded Intergallactic Empire by sending (on spaceships that looked like DC-10’s) a ton of aliens he didn’t like, by freezing them and sending them to Teegeeakk (Earth) to be destroyed in volcanoes where their souls flew into the sky and were captured by soul catching machines and were then (for some reason) sent into the bodies of early humans.
In order to feel better you have to get rid of these souls. (Thetans.)
Is that about right? Did I miss anything?

If I know all about it, and I’m just some guy, how can you expect people to give you their life savings to know the Big Secret?
It was on a South Park episode!! How secret is that?

Or maybe they’re making up bigger and better, sad, sci-fi mythology these days.
Hey ‘I like people to answer’ – you aren’t all that bright, are you?

Best answer:

Answer by chris m
That’s the kind of thing I’ve heard around the traps – and I have to admit, I think I get more value out of Star Trek. But there must be heaps more fun stuff in it, or is Tom Cruise really that stupid?

What do you think? Answer below!